hmm.. it's been a while since i wrote a new entry. well, i really don't have anything to say. i just realized that, the only time i could write (or type, for this matter) is when i feel really down.
Theory no. 1: well maybe i could only write why i'm sad or down, because i want to let out all the negative feelings i have inside. hoping that it eases the pain and at least clear my thoughts.
Theory no. 2: i can't write when i'm happy because no words could explain such happiness.
Theory no. 3: i don't really like to write. period. :)
Theory no. 4: it's the only outlet i know. because when one is happy, a smile is enough.
...
enough for that. i don't think it has anything to do with my title. hehe. time. i read all my previous entries and i came back into realizing why i started this blog, to find my inner self. in here i realized that, the more i look for myself, the more i lose it. doesn't make sense. let's put it this way: in the process of finding 'me' or 'i' the more i live for someone else, i tried putting myself in other peoples' shoes and live life accdg. to them. i have no idea why i do it, but maybe because i try to emulate them and hope that i find inside me the courage to step out of it and well, be myself. In order to be myself, i need certain circumstances or situations that would bring it out for me. like SOCRATES, Thaetetus. mid-wifery. bringing out the soul. well, that's what i want. unfortunately, i still don't hold that certain independence to do all this things, i still need to wait for the RiGHT TiME to do all this.
...
i'm still enslave in a world that judge. in a society where everyone expects you to conform with the norms. in a community full of Dasmans and wants you to be one. i'm still waiting for the time to be free from this world.
Theory no. 1: well maybe i could only write why i'm sad or down, because i want to let out all the negative feelings i have inside. hoping that it eases the pain and at least clear my thoughts.
Theory no. 2: i can't write when i'm happy because no words could explain such happiness.
Theory no. 3: i don't really like to write. period. :)
Theory no. 4: it's the only outlet i know. because when one is happy, a smile is enough.
...
enough for that. i don't think it has anything to do with my title. hehe. time. i read all my previous entries and i came back into realizing why i started this blog, to find my inner self. in here i realized that, the more i look for myself, the more i lose it. doesn't make sense. let's put it this way: in the process of finding 'me' or 'i' the more i live for someone else, i tried putting myself in other peoples' shoes and live life accdg. to them. i have no idea why i do it, but maybe because i try to emulate them and hope that i find inside me the courage to step out of it and well, be myself. In order to be myself, i need certain circumstances or situations that would bring it out for me. like SOCRATES, Thaetetus. mid-wifery. bringing out the soul. well, that's what i want. unfortunately, i still don't hold that certain independence to do all this things, i still need to wait for the RiGHT TiME to do all this.
...
i'm still enslave in a world that judge. in a society where everyone expects you to conform with the norms. in a community full of Dasmans and wants you to be one. i'm still waiting for the time to be free from this world.
